1. Cashtration: (n.): The act of buying a house which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
2. Ignoranus: (n): A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone: (n): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray painted very, very high.
7. Sarcasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.
11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all of these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like a serious bummer.
12. Decafalon: (n): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
13. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
14. Beelzebug: (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

" Engrossed late and soon in professional cares, getting and spending, you may so lay waste your powers that you may find too late, with hearts given away, that there is no place in your habit stricken souls for those gentler influences which make life worth living." ¹

Sir William Osler¹

A life in medicine may be a mixed blessing. We frequently lack time enough to do what we must much less to do what we'd like. This all consuming profession may result in emotional burnout. Another danger though awaits those who develop large and successful practices. Too often this results in material pursuits which blur the moral compass required to pursue those gentler influences. We too frequently do well for ourselves by doing well for others. True satisfaction in medicine will not come from material pursuits alone.

What are some of these gentler influences? Family, hobbies, music, reading, teaching, time for reflecting on ones spiritual needs, philanthropic pursuits, both in giving of time and possessions. To avoid the quicksand of professional boredom and disaffection we need to cultivate the altruism that has been the beacon of our profession. Another gentler influence is to care for the whole patient by sharing our own humanness, this frequently separates the fulfilled physician from others.

Our act of profession as healer is also a declaration of our commitment; a promise that we will not place our interests first, that we will not exploit the vulnerability of those we serve, that we will honor the trust which illness forces on those who are ill.

We should strive in our pursuit of these gentler influences to glean "a little of that wisdom which is pure, peaceable, gentle, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy."¹

Sir William Osler

¹ Aequanimitas

John J. Mohr, M.D.